This just in: Boston is a bunch of fags
Wait, no, we already knew that. Boston is flat out gay. Like H&M Gay. Like Bill Simmons Gay. Like guys who drink Michelob Ultra gay. You get the idea. Anyway, finally the good news rolls in - Boston lost to the Yankees and the Rays are the East Champs! Personally I'd be embarrassed. I'd be embarrassed mainly because I just finished 2nd to a team that has been in existence for 10 years. 10 people! Fucking 10! The main reason though is because when my season was on the line I lost to NYY 19-8! HOLY FUCKING SHIT!
Doesn't this pretty much dispel the theory that Terroy Francona is actually awake during games and kind of has a clue as to what's going on? Seriously people, Terry Francona was the A's bench coach in 03 - the guy is a fucking loser! Just in case you need proof, he started this guy against the NYY when he still had a chance to win the AL East - this fucking guy! Thank you Terry, thank you for being a shitty manager. Now I just can't wait to go to games in Anaheim next week to watch Boston lose to the Angels. I'm sure glad to hear Beckett and Daisuke are rested. I hope they remove their tampons in time. That would be really uncomfortable from what Curt Schilling told me. That's why he had blood on his sock - you knew that, right?
Beckett is back to being a pussy, what he was born to be. I honestly can't wait to watch him cry on the mound in game 1 of the ALDS. Here's to you Josh Beckett, you Kevin Douchelis dick sucker. And Daisuke, seriously, I hope you don't get shipped back to the mother land in Japan. You know, cuz you kinda suck and pitch 4 innings per start.
Eat a dick Boston, you're going home early this year. You know, now that David Ortiz is off the Roids, and he's back to doing what he normally shoud. What a fraud of a baseball player. After you replicate this BS next year, people will realize your whole career was a fraud since you were never good off the juice (unlike Bonds, but like Roiditek).